Like a bullet released from the chamber, there is no stopping the pain caused from unwise words dispatched from the mouth. We know this as Christians and yet sometimes we think the definition of ‘harsh words’ refers only to profanity and name calling. That couldn’t be further from the truth. We have the ability to cut people deeply with words that seem benign. Here’s some examples of how our words hurt others without ever using profanity or name calling:
- “I thought you would’ve learned that by now.”
- “Obviously you don’t want to change if you keep doing the same thing over again.”
- “I don’t really see much of a point for you.”
- “You’ve really messed up, you mind as well just quit while your ahead.”
Just because you feel strongly or have an important point, doesn’t mean you should speak it. The old saying, “the truth hurts” is only partially accurate. While the truth very often does cause us to reflect on our choices, the DELIVERY of the truth is equally as important.
When I am reading the bible and God shows me an area of my life that I am not doing well in, it is painful. Yet He is so loving and gentle in the way He reveals truth to me. When the truth is paired with God’s timing and His delivery it takes us to the next level. We grow, we’re encouraged, we transform. We end up having a genuine ‘Aha! moment”. However, even if some part of your message to your husband, wife, friend or mom is true; ask yourself these six questions before you pull the trigger and release the truth bullet from the chamber:
- Is it necessary or is it already known to them?
- Does it edify this person or condemn them?
- Is it kind?
- Does it impart grace to the hearers?
- What is my heart’s intention in telling them this?
- Does God want me to speak or be silent?
“Let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers.” (Ephesians 4:29)
“There is one who speaks like the piercings of a sword, But the tongue of the wise promotes health.” (Proverbs 12:18)
“Death and life are in the power of the tongue, And those who love it will eat its fruit.” (Proverbs 18:21)
October 3, 2017
Great word! What is “true” is not always the Truth the Father wants us to give away to others. May our words be life giving to build up rather than destroy.
October 3, 2017
Amen!